Sadden times

Well its been a while yet again but considering all we are going through its surprises me how strong we can be. My husband's mom stayed with us due to her increased dementia and it finally got to the point where we couldn't take care of her needs. So we then had to find a EMI unit hopefully close so we could still visit her which in the end we did. The one thing that was shocking was how much some of the homes wanted to be paided from the family. But again seeing how much care she needed, I do understand that issue but we just did not have the funds. But the place we found was close and its a nicely run place and she is taken care of and the careers do a really great job. But the sad thing is how she refuses to accept the situation and this is not just the illness she has always been difficult to deal with the fact the world is what it is and we have to accept that. She won't. So this has had a dark effect on my husband. And its really sad to see how different my dad and his mom are acting about this illness. Dad gets confused and frustrated but understands he has this disease and accepts it. Where Keith's mom fights and argues that everyone else is wrong she is perfectly fine.

To say I am worried about this on my husband is putting it mildly, My dad just recently died and it has been another blow in my own self as well the family. The thing is that for him it was unexpected and quick. I think he understood and didn't want to live this way anymore as well as not hurting his family. For my mother-in-law I fear she would take her kids with her. So in this record I see how to love unconditional and how to destroy intensely.

T

getting there is certainly half the fun

Well we are back in the saddle of doing shows and events its almost like going back to school and sharing what we have all been up to during break. Some of us only meet up at the shows so we have to remember we are there to work ! and my poor husband, Keith has now bought me a pager to contact me when I have a client. so no rest for the wicked.
Over the years I have noticed new faces with exhibitors which changes the energy of a venue. I have noticed that some of the veterans will share information the the novices and instead of seeing them as some kind of threat and I find that makes for a more rewarding time. Humans can be very territorial and that spells the difference from a well turned out show to one that we can't wait to get out of there.
All in all this year is more letting the right customers come to my stand and in having that attitude it has been a really fun time which in the end of the day is what it is all about.
take care
T

Here's to 2008

And goodbye to 07 - it has been a year of trudging and slipping back down that slope of life. I am so glad to see the back end of that year. Although I have accomplished several goals this year. more painting and pushing out my art works. The frustration seeing my father leaving bits of his memory into some black hole as well my mother-in-law who studied all her life and really worked at her healing also being struck down. She now is in care and it is so disheartening that maybe going like my sister suddenly is more of a blessing than I first realized.
So on to the frontier of the New Year but not so much about making promises that won't come to fruition but to accept what I can accomplish and yet still try each day - to watch a little less TV, to not be bothered about dishes and to make sure at the end of each day I do tell my husband how much I value him.
so come on 08 - I am ready for ye....
T